Covid and Self-Care

There has been a big self-care movement going on for a while now and I am all for it. I personally am someone who thinks it’s important to “love” yourself, but more importantly to take care of yourself.  The problem is, I don’t think I’ve ever truly known what it means or how to do it. I have, however, experienced the effects on my body when I wasn’t taking care of myself. Some of the major health issues I have had in my life could absolutely be tied back to stress. But the million-dollar question for me always is…how do I truly reduce stress in my life? And even more…how do I take care of myself AND reduce stress in my life when I am going through a difficult season?

Enter Covid-19.

I’ve mentioned in some of my other writing how stressful of a time the beginning of Covid was for me. And I know I’m not alone…I can’t speak for everyone, but I’m sure it was for all of us!  I am very fortunate that it has not severely affected my health or the health of my loved ones. I can’t even imagine how much more stressful it would be for those who dealt with that as well.  For me, it was all emotional. It felt like everything possible was hitting me at once. 1st year of marriage. Infertility. Covid. Working in Human Resources during a pandemic. Starting IVF. Failing IVF. Additional health scares. I’ve felt buried, overwhelmed and on the verge of a breakdown more times than not in the past year of my life.

So why I am talking about Covid and self-care in the same blog post, you might wonder? The reason is because when this is all said and done and Covid is a distance memory…I hope I will always remember what it taught me about self-care. 

Stick with me…

I distinctly remember several weekends during Quarantine in the spring of 2020, when everything was closed down and there was literally nothing to do.  Is it weird when I tell you that some of those weekends were the best of my life and weekends that I particularly remember to this day? You see, before Covid, I felt the pressure to say yes to anything and everything that was asked of me. Even if 95% of me didn’t want to do it. Part of it was probably FOMO….part of it was that I am loyal…part of me probably said yes because I didn’t want people to stop asking me to do things…and the other part is that I probably have never known how to truly take care of myself. Those few weekends last year were the best because I was forced to slow down and get in touch with my mind and body. 

So what did I do? 

I took baths. I planted a garden (it only produced one green pepper all summer, but that’s beside the point!). My husband and I took walks with the dogs. I baked. I listened to the birds sing outside my window. I joined a virtual cookbook club. I sat outside and read books. My husband and I went on scenic drives while the sun was setting. We grabbed takeout and ate it on picnic tables outside. I literally had no concept of time or cared what time it was because there was nowhere to be. It was a scary time because of the unknowns of Covid, of course, but what I didn’t realize at the time was those weekends were also magical in a unique way. I was beginning to learn how to care for myself for the 1st time in 39 years.

In the months following Quarantine last spring, life continued to move at a slower pace for me….until a few months ago when I had a wake-up call.  

Life in Iowa is probably a little different than other places because mostly things have been back to “normal” for a while now. (Sidenote: This might be a good time to mention that I will never get political in my posts. Politics divide people. The goal of my blog is to bring people together, show support, share my story and give love to others who are dealing with hard times. I will not use this as a political platform. Ok? Ok good.) So anyway, Iowa has been “normal” for a while, which means events are starting to happen again. I remember one Saturday when I had 3 different things I was invited to throughout the day. 2 of the 3 things I really didn’t want to do but felt like I had to.  Of course I said yes to all 3 things. I remember thinking on Sunday night how much I regretted saying yes to all of those things. I was rushing through the weekend. I didn’t have any time for myself.  I felt unsettled. It was a feeling I hadn’t felt in a long time. After reflecting on it, I realized it was because of Covid I hadn’t felt that way in a long time. Now that things were starting to return to “normal”, I wasn’t sure I wanted to go back to “normal”. I needed to find what worked for me now that I had experienced both sides of the spectrum.

What I’ve reflected on since that weekend is that Covid gave me an opportunity to reset. We had everything stripped away from us because of Covid. I wasn’t able to do the things I normally would do for months and months, but in those months it gave me the opportunity to learn what a different pace of life was like. And now I can recognize in my mind and body when I am feeling overwhelmed where before I would’ve just ignored it and kept going. So at this point, it is up to me to slowly integrate the things I want back in my life. Which means that I need to learn how to say no when it doesn’t serve me. Yes, it’s important to spend time with family. Yes, it’s important to be social. And I love spending time with my friends and family! But it’s not good for anyone if my hearts not in it when I am with loved ones. I need to protect time for myself to just be….just like I did last year unintentionally.  

Covid taught me self-care. 

I hope that comment doesn’t offend you, but it’s my truth. It doesn’t take away from all of the horrible things that Covid brought into this world…death, illness, mental health issues, stress, unemployment, financial strain…I could go on….but I personally have to find the meaning in the suffering that I go through. That’s how I have survived the last 9 years of my life. I have to find something good that comes out of the really difficult times because that’s the only way I can justify having to go through them. So for me, I’m thankful that going through a pandemic taught me how to listen to and understand my body and mind better. And because of that I have committed to protecting time for myself to just be…and say no when my heart isn’t into something.  So I will always say…Covid taught me self-care.

What did Covid teach you?